Real Event OCD: You’re not alone
One of the cruellest aspects of Real Event OCD (REOCD) is that we wonder if we are uniquely bad people. Sometimes we may think – or even become convinced – that we are the single most terrible and irredeemable person on Earth.
Have you ever felt that way? I certainly did, during my worst times with REOCD. It didn’t even occur to me to find out if other people felt the way I did. That’s the power of shame, I suppose – it keeps us small, disconnected, and alone.
Allow me to gently challenge this belief, without wanting to get into reassurance-giving. Consider these insights for a moment:
In 2025, researchers gathered data from 10 countries and found that 3% of the people in those countries had experienced OCD during the last 12 months.
Those countries are populated by around 1.7 billion people in total. So that means potentially 51 million people, in those countries alone, have been struggling with OCD in recent times.
And how many people might have the REOCD sub-type? Well, health specialists NOCD surveyed their members who live with OCD in 2023 and found that 37% of them experienced Real Event OCD.
These figures suggest to me that there are, conservatively, tens of millions of people around the globe currently struggling with REOCD. Tens of millions of people who feel bad, dishonest, and undeserving – and find themselves stuck in the obsessive-compulsive cycle, as you might do. And tens of millions of people who have had the thought “nobody is as bad as me”.
How unimaginably sad that there are so many of us who have felt this way.
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If you’ve experienced REOCD, I don’t need to tell you why it might be difficult to open up and share your struggles with other people (outside of panicked confessions). Understandably, it’s also difficult to sustain a safe and contained online space for people to come together and share their REOCD experiences. There is still a lot of misunderstanding, stigma, and fear out there.
But I hope it helps, in some way, to know that you are truly not alone – no matter how convincing the Inner Critic inside you is. The specifics of your past actions don’t matter, and REOCD can latch onto a wide spectrum of perceived ‘wrongdoing’; just know that there are so many other people out there experiencing similar levels of crippling guilt, shame, and anxiety.
My wish is for people living with REOCD to feel understood, validated, and supported by others so that they feel less isolated and more human. In my book, I briefly explore the option of sharing in a safe way with a qualified therapist.
I also signpost groups like Obsessive Compulsive Anonymous and online communities such as r/OCDRecovery, as ways to anonymously connect with people who’ve experienced REOCD and are willing to offer empathy and support.
I’m happy to message with anyone reading this who just wants to feel less alone. Not as a qualified therapist or coach, but as a fellow REOCD sufferer who can understand. Feel free to message me at bodhipeters@outlook.com, even using a temporary email address if you prefer.
In the nicest possible way, I’m not so interested in the specifics of your events – I’m more interested in how you’re doing emotionally, and what tools of recovery might be available to you.
If you do decide to reach out to someone – and that’s entirely your decision - protecting your own safety is the absolute priority. Only share information you’re comfortable to share, be mindful of compulsive over-sharing or confession, and build a sense of trust with the other person before going too deep into any details.
Sending best wishes to all.
